"Oh-and now you have time to find a boyfriend?"

     About a month ago, one of my neighbors moved out and he saw me in the elevator, and asked what I was doing for the summer.  I guess he specifically was more interested in who I might be dating this summer, because he claimed that someone in the building had a thing for me.  And I told him that I was busy and not exactly on the prowl for a guy.  His response, "You probably have more time now to find someone."  I was polite at the time, but a voice in my head was screaming, "No! No! You evil ass!  Women do not NEED significant others at all times."  It was certainly an awkward situation, only made more awkward because my neighbor has told me on more than one occasion that he would've asked me out if he was single.  (Minor detail: I'm NOT interested and never was.)  But fundamentally, there was a bigger issue at hand: women do not need men in order to be successful or happy.  Just because I'm single does not mean that I'm looking for love.  It's not that I'm opposed to romantic intricacies, it's just that I don't feel a compelling need to be on the prowl.   

     As someone has been single for most of her life, I absolutely detest when people still think that women can't be independent and successful, and if you are independent and successful, then you're a lesbian, a man-hater, selfish, or not interested in ever having a family.  But I'm none of those things, and most likely, neither are you!  It would be nice to have a significant other, but it's not a requirement.  Seriously.  

    In one of my children's books, "Sisters Grimm: The Everafter War," Snow White is talking to one of the Sisters Grimm.  (The Sisters Grimm are the long lost descendants of the Brothers Grimm and they live in a place called Ferryport Landing, where all fairy tale characters are real and living together.  Snow White is engaged to Prince Charming, but doesn't want to marry him.  She is the resident self-defense teacher, and here she explains why she can't marry Prince Charming.)

"I won't marry someone who has to take care of me.  I'm going to take care of myself.  I have to prove to myself that I can, again."

(Snow White was attacked by BlueBeard, and was petrified, and couldn't use her self-defense techniques, which made her furious with herself.)

So no, I'm not looking for a boyfriend, Mr. Neighbor.  If one fell out of the sky, I wouldn't refuse him, but I'm not, nor have I ever been, in need of a man to get me through the day.  I've done just fine for the last 22 years.

Listening to: the new Grizzly Bear album.